monday musings

Happy Monday!

I am taking half a day off from work to rest. Taking care of my body is important as I will be feeling too drowsy at work anyway. It also gives my mind more time to relax and feel good about myself.

You see, I did quite a few things over the past few days which I have never done before.

Last wednesday, I used, a service marketplace to look for an electrician to fix the many broken lights in my unit. It’s pretty simple. You just fill in the issue and service providers will send you quotes where you can compare and check out their customer reviews. Finally, you can just book the service providers of your choice once you’ve decided. I picked the ones with lots of recent good reviews and also charges zero inspection fees. They had come over for an inspection and will be in contact to schedule a repair date.

On saturday, I tried out, the Malaysia Netflix version where you can access a wide range of movies, dramas and some documentary for a small fee. I’m on the trial version and though I’m disappointed that some preferred movies are not in the list, I’m happy to catch the ones in my list. I started by watching Chocolat. It is an interesting movie with a subtle hint of women empowerment. It teaches us that it is okay to be different and we should be tolerant of other people’s beliefs and lifestyle. And there is also the younger version of Johnny Depp! =p

After a 3 years hiatus, I finally resumed where I left off in Code Academy. At that time, I was totally new to PHP and Javascript. As I go through the lessons, it felt pretty simple now. I have this OCD where I must complete what I started. So, I finally finished the Javascript Project and it felt really good! My friends (colleagues) have been telling me that I have improved a lot but that didn’t really register with me. I know they are sincere but somehow, I cannot internalize their compliments. However, after I completed the Javascript Project, it finally struck me and I was filled with a sweet, enveloping kind of joy. I finally feel it in my bones that I have really improved. As usual, my devious mind has a lot to comment on such as “If only you have completed this project earlier, you would have progressed further.” and “What a waste! You could have really improved yourself within that 3 years instead of only continuing now”. I mindfully let the thoughts go and replaced it with happier thoughts like “it’s okay, better late than never” and “now that I have started, I should continue the momentum and keep learning and improving”.

I do get really happy that I got excited when I learn something new. Something as simple as how do you indicate to the user that they have really clicked a button? By making the button move slightly downwards when you clicked and have it moved back to its original position. Everyone takes it for granted but it is really a simple touch to the UI. 😀

Occasionally, I do feel pangs of sadness. Sometimes, it just feels as though my mind wants to be sad. It thrives on unhappiness. It could be that my mind has been wrongly wired. Trigger – behavior – reward. It triggers itself by reminding me of sad, depressing thoughts. My body will then behave by crying. The tears just can’t wait to get out. I am not sure what the reward is. Feeling better? I admit there is some sense of release from crying but what’s the point? It becomes like an addiction. The after effects is what I dislike the most. Unlike others, my face stays red for a long period of time and my eyes feels tired. I’m doing my best to rewire these embarrassing behavior by doing something I have stopped for long time.

Walks! Conveniently, I have a family friendly park outside where I go for a 30 minute walk. I see children interacting and playing happily. I see dad playing badminton with his kids. I see elderly people walking, either with a stick, an umbrella or accompanied by someone else. As I walked, I also notice the other houses, the cars parked along the road, the blue sky and the many, many trees. I had a lightbulb on why people like children. They are so young, innocent and full of potential. After 30 minutes, I do feel much better. =)

The last part of my weekend is the most adventurous. Picking up my brother from the airport at night, close to midnight, alone. Now, many might think it is normal or ordinary but it is not something I usually do. Normally, I will be fast asleep on Sunday nights but here I am, in my car, heading towards the airport. Thankfully, there were no traffic jams or accidents and I reached my destination in one piece. Being able to be of service to my family is also a joyful thing and I am glad I was able to contribute. ^^

That’s all folks! May you be well and happy.


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